Valerie Rae Hanneman
1 Chronicles 29:17 “I know, my God, that You examine our hearts and rejoice when You find integrity there” (NLT)
One day I was hanging out with two of my favorite guys. My son, Steven, and his friend Clark. Steven had gotten a really good grade on a report and I was in the mood to celebrate. When I found out that Clark had never had teppan-yaki I knew what the reward was going to be. We went over to Japanese Kitchen and we placed our food order. Steven asked if he and Clark could add a side of mushrooms to their order. I checked my wallet. I had just barely enough. I flagged down our waiter and ordered the additional sides of mushrooms. When our bill came, it was wrong. I called our waiter over and told him there was a mistake. He was highly indignant. They always check their bills carefully and there wasn’t a mistake. As gently as possible, I assured him that there was a mistake. He interrupted me to protest that there was not. A little louder I told him that the additional sides of mushrooms were not on the bill - they had undercharged me. Suddenly he had nothing to say. He looked at the bill, took it in the back and corrected it. While he was gone, the woman sitting next to me asked me, “Why did you do that? They would have never known.” “I would have known.” I answered her, “I am a Christian, and I take that very seriously.” She just shook her head as if I had a problem. But I just smiled.
Integrity is defined as being “the quality of being honest and morally upright.” These days, it seems like it is an old-fashioned word or maybe a word open to interpretation. Another way I have heard it defined is as “Integrity is who you are when nobody is looking.”
I saw a little sign this week. It said “How naughty can I be and still get to Heaven?” I know that this is supposed to be funny - but it isn’t. (I know that our place in heaven is not dependent on how naughty we are but on the grace and mercy of Jesus’s salvation.) What is sad to me is the idea that not only is it acceptable to see how much you can get away with and still be considered a good person - but that it is considered to be cute.
Who are you when nobody is looking? Do your thoughts say what your mouth would never utter? Do you pad that deduction on your tax return? Do you offer comfort to a friend then mock them behind their back? Do you point fingers and place blame rather than admit your fault? Is it easier to two-step around your integrity than to stand firm in every situation?
Our integrity should be important to us because it is important to Father. It should be the way that we live our lives and not the way that we live through each situation. We must make the deliberate decision in our hearts to be a person of integrity before we are in a situation that challenges our integrity. A quick situational decision is all too often the wrong decision.
Father searches our hearts and rejoices when He finds integrity there. The integrity that He is looking for is the foundational integrity and not the “blowing with the wind” integrity that the world embraces.
When we got out to the car, my son told me that he was proud of me for telling the truth. “You didn’t have to, Mom.” he said. He was right, I didn’t have to. If I didn’t say anything nobody would ever know. It was their mistake, not mine. I could have stopped after the first attempt to correct the problem. I had tried and they didn’t want to listen. I did not tell them about the mistake because I wanted them to think I was a “good” person. I did not persist because I wanted to prove I was right. I did not tell the truth so to show off what a Christian I was to the people at the table. I didn’t even do it so I could be a good example to my son and Clark.
I did it because it was the right thing to do.
Now of course there were some benefits to my choice. First and most important is that when my integrity was tested I passed the test with flying colors and Father rejoiced over me. Just knowing that Father is rejoicing over me is worth everything I did. But there is more. Even though I did not tell the truth about the bill to be an example to Steven - I was. My son knows that the choice about the bill was mine and he knows that I acted with integrity. When the choice is his maybe my choices will influence his. And then the woman sitting next to me. No doubt about it, she thought I had made the wrong choice. She thought I was a weird one. But maybe - just maybe - the day will come when she will remember that weird Christian woman who took her faith seriously enough to make the right choice instead of the easy choice. And maybe my choices will make a difference in her life.
The choice is ours. We can choose to two-step around our integrity when it is easier for us to do so. Or we can choose to stand firm as people of integrity. If we choose the two-step then we choose to sink into the sludge of this world. If we choose to stand firm then we get the satisfaction of making the right choices. We get to know that Father is rejoicing over us. We get to be a positive influence to our family & friends. We get to be a positive influence on those we don’t know. We get to change the Kingdom. That is a win-win as far as I am concerned!
Two step or stand firm - the choice is ours.
P.S. - You remember that statement “Integrity is who you are when nobody is looking.” That doesn’t apply to us. As Christ followers there is not a moment when Father is not looking at us - and knowing the choices we make.
Father, to be a person of integrity in a world that does not understand is hard. But to know that You are rejoicing over me when I stand firm - that alone makes it all worth it. Help me so that my life gives You reasons to rejoice.
Contact Valerie or sign up for the e-Ministry of Fresno First at valerie@fresnofirst.org