Valerie Rae Hanneman
John 1:12-13 “Yet to all who received Him, to those who believed in His name, He gave the right to become children of God—children born not of natural descent, nor of human decision or a husband's will, but born of God” (NIV)
Do you remember that geeky little kid back in elementary school who just never fit in? You know, the one who was always picked last for the team - no matter what the game was. When you were stuck in the classroom for rainy-day recess nobody ever picked them during “Thumbs-up, Seven-up” nor did they sit with them in the cafeteria. These geeks were on the fringes of playground society. I know so much about the geeky kids because that was what I was. I was a geek. Schoolyard rejection combined with a home life that featured a step-father who took every opportunity to assure me that I could never measure up to “his daughters” made a negative impact on me. To say that I had low self-esteem would be to say that I had at least some level of self esteem - and I did not. I knew what I was - I was a big, fat loser.
That was the image that I carried of myself through most of my life. I hid it well behind a mask of false security and aloofness but the truth was that I knew that it was just a matter of time until people saw the reality behind the mask and realized that I was a loser in life.
After traveling in a country far away from God for almost 20 years, I returned to Him when I was 41. The mask that I had in place now hid the additional loser-ness of drug addiction. My bitterness at my stepfather could not - would not - allow me to accept God as my Father. But over the years, those barriers were removed as God taught me who I am, whose I am and why I am. And now my relationship with God, my Father, is the most incredible thing that ever happened to me.
My heart swells with so much joy when I think about how God has taken me to be His child. He has chosen me and calls me His own. He looks at me with honest eyes and sees me as I am. He doesn’t see me as the playground geek or the step-daughter who could never measure up. He sees me as His - and He sees me as a winner. I am my Father’s daughter. And if my Father - my only real Father - is the King of all creation and eternity - do you know what that makes me? I’m a princess! Talk about an ego boost! I am a princess - daughter of a King more powerful than we can imagine.
But I am not a fairy-tale princess - nor am I even like an earthly princess. I am a princess in the kingdom of God. In my Father’s kingdom princesses (and princes) work for the good of the Kingdom. I don’t kiss frogs, sleep on peas nor dance on glass slippers. I am not waited on hand and foot by a bevy of servants - instead my Father calls me to serve. I serve Him first. He has called me to serve others in the Kingdom and to serve others outside of the Kingdom. He calls it “Loving your neighbor as yourself” And my service to Him affects the Kingdom for all eternity. My Father values my service.
Earthly princesses tend to be a little snooty. In a photo-op you see them hanging out with the “commoners” as if they do that all the time. Truth is though that the minute the camera goes down, they wipe their hands on a towel, climb into their limo and off they go without a backwards glance. My Father, the King, says His children are not to behave like that. We are not to judge the value of a person by the world’s standards - but by the King’s standards. He call’s it “The first shall be last and the last shall be first.” How I treat others affects the Kingdom. My Father values me being real in this world.
Princesses sometimes get sent to other countries to represent their kingdoms. I also am in a world that is not my home, representing my Father and a Kingdom that is my home. My Father says that I am of a Royal priesthood, an ambassador of hope to this world. I am to be an ambassador who reflects Him in my thoughts, my words and my actions. My Father expects me to represent Him to the best of my ability. How I act in this alien world affects my Kingdom home. My Father values me as His ambassador.
Like all princesses, I long to be in my home Kingdom, to be with my Father. But for now, my Father wants me to continue to serve Him here. So I continue to serve Him with joy, knowing that I have His promise - the King’s promise - that when my work here is done, my Father is going to send the Prince of Peace, Jesus, to bring me home. And I will never have to leave. My King-Father values me enough to want me with Him for all eternity.
I suffered with a lack of esteem for most of my life. I looked in the mirror and saw a loser-geek. Because my Father has shown me how valuable and worthy I am I look in the mirror now and see Princess Valerie. He has answered the questions of who I am, whose I am, and why I am.
I am Princess Valerie, daughter of the King of all creation and eternity.. I am His. I am called to live a life of joy and service to the King and His Kingdom.
When you look in the mirror do you see what the world calls you - or do you see what Your Father calls you. See who you are, whose you are and why you are through His eyes and You will know how incredibly much He values You. You are His beloved child.
Father, sometimes the world tells me that I am a geek loser because I don’t measure up to their standards. Thank You for showing me that I am a princess in Your kingdom and that You value me. My worth is found in Your eyes - not theirs. I love You, Father.
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Posted by Valerie at August 20, 2005 08:30 PM